Snap Thought #13

People are born with a good and pure heart.

Yet another existencial crisis

I've been trying to study Calculus IV today, but I haven't been into the mood for that. Actually, I think I can't been much into the mood for many things, really. I got this feeling that all of my efforts are worthless. And it makes me wonder what my existence is all about. To do all the worthless things? To survive? I learned how to get rid of those those thoughts, making myself busy and not thinking about it. It won't ease my silenced inner self, tho. I can't feel I grow up as a person who works for making our beautiful planet a better place to live, but a toolmaker, who makes tools so others can use and change world at their will, since they got the power to do so.

I'm sure I'm not the first and won't be the last to reflect about it, but this kind of reflection came in such an early stage in my life, when I still got absolutely nothing in return to the society. The only thing I got are questions that nobody can answer, but that I should find it myself.

Sex

I went to my friend's party today and listening to some of my friends, I found out a bit of their sexual life. Apparently, from what I heard before, I could deduce it, but listening to themselves is another thing. Straight to the point, they had sex with many girls along their life. And sometimes, even while they still have a girlfriend.

While I listened to them, I couldn't say anything because I grew up with different values, experiences and environments. I just wanted to listen about their stories, tho. And it made me wonder if, by being different from them, I'm missing anything by not having some sex experiences like them.

If I think on the pleasure I would have and the knowledge about conquering girls I would learn, then yes, I'm missing a lot. But it probably wouldn't make my heart beat any stronger.

Snap Thought #12

I used to believe the most important things doesn't depend on time.